Please Hold…
September 9, 2011, 9:49 am
Filed under: blessings, humor, Parenting, Teenagers | Tags: , ,

I was on hold today for a call into a social service agency of our county. Hello, this is…we are located at…yes operator we do accept collect calls…then repeat in Spanish. Now a list of options for directions, hours and a staff directory. I choose to press number four. I then get a new voice that tells me “We are currently experiencing a high number of calls, your expected wait time will be at least five minutes, please remain on the line, if you would like to leave a message a service professional will get back to you within one business day. We generally process paper work in the order it is received, if you would like to know what date we are currently processing on, press seven from the main greeting.” Now I get some broken up elevator music until the greeting repeats itself.

It made we wonder what would happen if we parented our teenagers with the same approach. Hello this is you mother, I am located at…yes operator I will accept collect calls…then repeat in mumble, grunt language. To talk to your dad press 1, mom press 2, please leave a detailed, clearly stated message after the beep. If this is an emergency please hang up and call 911. If you would like to know whats for dinner please press 4, and someone will get back to you within two business days. If you need a ride, press 5, make sure you have the requisition paper work completed and turned in the week prior to your request. For your convenience your paper work will be kept on file for three months.

Then no matter what number they push, a new voice comes on and says “We are currently experiencing a high number of insignificant, whiny, attitudes, if you have any hope to get a reply, please change your tone of voice and call back after you have tried at least three other ways to get your question answered.” Now we would play some classic blues while they tried to figure out what just happened.


5 Comments so far
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I think kari johnson is funny but i am still sweeter. You want to know how many times she has put me on hold……Love u anyway klm

Comment by klmsweet

I LOVE this!

Comment by Melissa

thanks Melissa!

Comment by Kari

FUNNY……. would like one for teachers! (since I’m an empty-nester, and my boys have their OWN answering service for MY calls. ha)

Comment by Jane

Jane, you crack me up, what would the teacher one say? Would there be a separate one for students, parents, administrators?

Comment by Kari

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