kariskhaos


Am I a bad mom if I hate the sport of wrestling?

This week is the last week of football and soccer for my kids. Winter sports are starting to gear up and I am torn between the two Seasons. I have loved this Indian summer and really enjoy watching my kids and their friends play. It is dark and cold tonight, as I sit in front of the fire with GusGus at my feet, I feel the weather changing and with it, I look forward as basketball will begin. Isaac will play varsity for the first time and Christian will swing for both JV and varsity. Jessie will play freshman girls basketball.

That leaves John. John has wrestled the last three years starting as a seventh grader and continuing last year on the freshman/sophomore team. Here is the truth, the ugly truth about me. I hate wrestling, yes, hate with an extreme passion. I have tried to find the excitement, I have tried to learn about the rules and understand the sport. I still hate it. I hate the smell of the gym, the taped mats, the stupid shoes. I hate the long,long, wait to see my son, for two minutes in a sport he just is not that good at.

I love my kids, and I really want to support them in all they do. I struggle with my own bias as I will gladly be in a gym watching basketball from sun up to sun down, but put me in that same gym with wrestlers and it is as if a vice has been attached to my head, I get a headache, I can’t sit still, I get claustrophobic. It is ridiculous, and I truly am ashamed. I really do not like wrestling. I am as bad as the character in Green Eggs and Ham. Maybe worse, I have tried it and I still don’t like it.

If John was really good, and he expressed his joy for wrestling the way I see him light up at football, I might be able to tolerate it. If he had deep relationships with his teammates, came home after a match just glad he was on the team, I could maybe force myself to get some counseling and get over my intense dislike of everything that has anything to do with wrestling. I just don’t get that feeling from John. He does it to stay in shape, that I get. Let’s find another way, seriously, any other possible way to accomplish that goal.

At times I thought John wrestled just because of my hate for it. He knew I would never stop him from doing something if he expressed a true interest in it. He did get to stay in shape and the subtle torture of his mother was an added benefit to his passive aggressive style of survival. This may have been true for last year but I thought maybe, we had both matured enough to reassess the wrestling team option.

I bravely, and selfishly approached the subject at dinner tonight. Do you really love it John? All that time, smell, spandex,weird shoes and long meets for his two minutes on the mat? Would he consider any other options? I was expecting a stone silence, the John wall of non communicative steel. He then asked what else he could do to stay in shape and my whole world got brighter. It was as if God had come into the darkness and flipped on the Sun!

This discussion is far from over, I may be getting my nose plug and a new comfy seat to last through yet another year of the hated sport. Still it was a small victory, and John said he would consider other options. One small step against wrestling one giant step in a relationship with my son.

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3 Comments so far
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I have to admit that I used to love going to wrestling matches in high school, but the thought of my kids participating… smelly, sweaty, gross mats, germs galore, the pressure to “make weight.” Ick, ick, ick! Unfortunately, I think their genetics (all my cousins were state level and we don’t exactly fit the basketball body type) will probably send them that direction…

But, you’ll understand if we stick to joining you at basketball games this winter and avoid the intrigue of the wrestling mat until absolutely necessary. =)

Comment by Alissa

Okay so Alissa I am praying for your future. John is leaning towards not doing this but either way it was good to get it off my chest.

Comment by Kari

I rarely drop remarks, but i did a few searching and wound up here Am I a bad mom if I hate the sport
of wrestling? kariskhaos. And I do have
2 questions for you if it’s allright. Could it be simply me or does it appear like some of these comments come across like coming from brain dead individuals? 😛 And, if you are posting on additional places, I would like to keep up with anything fresh you have to post. Could you list of every one of all your shared pages like your Facebook page, twitter feed, or linkedin profile?

Comment by online deals




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