Whimsical Wednesday: The Journey to becoming Hugz the Clown and Beyond, Part 2; Falling In Love
February 1, 2012, 9:35 pm
Filed under: college, humor, love, Parenting, travel | Tags: , , , , ,

Whimsical Wednesday: The Journey to becoming Hugz the clown and beyond, Part 2; Falling In Love

“There must have been some magic in that old top hat they found, for when they put it on his head he began to dance around” from the song Frosty The Snowman. This was how I felt the first time I put clown make-up on. I was nineteen, and I knew for the first time the joy of finding something you are truly meant for. The magic was there, the love was beginning, and my summer had just begun.

As a tradition honoring the history of clowning, we were silent. Once you started putting your make-up on no talking was allowed. I am not the best silent person, I always lose the quiet game, I was born with a loud laugh and gregarious personality. Now I had to be disciplined, I had to remain silent but still communicate. It was hard, but it opened a new world for me that had not been there before. All of my passion and feelings needed to be expressed with out words, just my body language and facial expressions.

I had always felt words were over rated. Growing up I had always been told I was beautiful. I had blonde hair, blue eyes, a huge smile with white teeth and a decent body. Boys, parents, friends, family and strangers had commented on my beauty all my life. I hated the attention and often felt like an object instead of a person. It had always felt superficial, and tainted so I never believed it. I thought if people looked beyond the image and into my heart they would not think I was pretty at all.

Now I got to put make-up on, not glamorous make up, but a whole lot of white goo. I covered my face and my teeth actually looked yellow. My hair was pulled back and hidden. I wore oversized clothes and a floppy hat. A smile was painted in bright red, pink balloons drawn on my cheeks and exaggerated eyelashes. This mask of exaggerated features, the mode of silence, and crazy clothes opened the door for me to find myself beyond the image in the mirror.

The summer was filled with discoveries about myself, about the countries we traveled to, and more about living in close quarters with other people than I care to remember. Each chance I got to perform was a confirmation from my head to my heart. I fell in love with the art of Clowning. I communicated with children and adults from all over the world. We spoke different languages, we had very different lives but somehow in my make-up, in my silence, more was shared than if we had talked for hours on end. I learned laughter is universal, smiles do not need words, and in expressing myself through being a clown I had fallen in love with me.

Next week part 3: So Now What?


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