kariskhaos


Too Tired to Blog

In theory it is a great idea. Go to the midnight showing of The Hunger Games with your daughter. Today that theory seems way overrated, as I am struggling to function. There were days when I could have pulled this three hours of sleep thing off, but alas, they are long gone. Into the theatre I brought tums, advil and chocolate. I definitely needed all three. It was a great movie. The books are of course better, but I was satisfied with the movies representation. Often I am not.

Now it is seven on Friday night, and the only thing I can think about is curling up on the couch with my wine and dozing through a basketball game. This does not make for much of a blog. Jessie, offered this most recent poem to me to publish since I am thought less. She was asked to write a poem and this is what she came up with. “If you knew me would you still want me?” Her personal assessment and clear understanding of who she is brought me to tears. I guess we have done something right, because all of our kids are very aware that there is nothing they could do, or become that would keep us from loving them. That is, besides running away to join the circus, I say with my tongue in my cheek.

If You Knew, Would You Still Want Me?

If you knew all there was to know…
Who I would become,
What I would be like,
My biggest strength,
My greatest weakness,
Would you still want me?

If you knew…
That as a baby I would be silent and calm, a tree on a still night,
But when my hair was in pig tails I turned sassy and loud,
Soon, your little girl in pink would be switched with a tomboy overnight,
That too would pass and a young women would take her place,
Would you still want me?

If you knew…
That I would grow up with three older brothers,
Who would beat up on me and drive me crazy,
Push to make me better, but there to catch me when I fall,
And be my first friends,
Would you still want me?

If you knew…
How much I would love sports,
Soccer, basketball, tennis, and yes even football,
That they would define who I am as much as waves define the ocean,
And propel me more than anything else,
Would you still want me?

If you knew…
I would never be a girly-girl,
I would care less about the newest fashion or hair style,
Stay out of all the unnecessary drama,
And find some friends to keep for life,
Would you still want me?

If you knew…
That I would give up the world to keep from failing you,
Because disappointing anyone is something I just couldn’t do,
That I would be my own worst enemy,
And in my eyes see only my flaws,
Would you still want me?

If you knew…
School would be my palace,
And nothing could stop me academically,
That you would have to fight to give me a challenge,
And even then I would breeze right through it,
Would you still want me?

If you knew…
At a young age my heart would be exposed to the world, an open book,
Already feeling its pain, as if it were my own,
Putting others needs before my own,
And always ready to help in whatever way I could,
Would you still want me?

If you knew…
I would dream dreams so big, the only way to reach them to fly,
And as I took the jump, trying to fly, I would fall,
But undeterred, I’d pick myself up,
Ready for another leap of faith,
Would you still want me?

If you knew…
In many ways I would be a typical teenager,
Sometimes moody, sometimes happy, and sometimes a mixture of the two,
I’d push all your buttons, just to push them again to see your reaction,
A pain in your a** and the reason you need a drink at night,
Would you still want me?

If you knew…
I would find a way inside you heart, and rest there forever,
Cause the twinkle in your eye, that’d remind me of the stars on a clear summer night,
The smile on your face,
And the warmth in your touch, a fire on a winter night,
Would you still want me?

If you knew all there was to know…
Who I would become,
What I would be like,
My biggest strength,
My greatest weakness,
Would you still want me… and more importantly, would you still love me?

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4 Comments so far
Leave a comment

Ah, what a gem that girl is …

Comment by Barb Stoefen

thanks Barb, i am so blessed

Comment by Kari

Amazing poem Jess!

Comment by Anonymous

Oops -I that was me…Julane

Comment by Anonymous




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